A game of mini golf after the trauma of having his hair cut. It’s a very important thing for him to learn to control the panic, but sometimes we win, and sometimes we loose.Today we lost. 😔Even sitting on my lap he still couldn’t cope. Ah well, the next haircut may go better 💇😕
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It’s the buzzing, the vibrations and feel of the comb on his head that sends him over the edge. The barber works fast, and he’s never ready for the next movement. Suddenly it’s a blow dryer to clear of the loose hairs and it’s a new round of fear shrieking and curling into himself.
He sat on my lap, I held his arms and hands for security pressure, he still hated every second, bar the 2 minutes in the middle when the barber used scissors to cut the top. Yes!
Then back to the clippers for the edges and more crying and shrieking.
The barber was efficient, but I’m not sure he fully understood what he was dealing with, even though he was full of encouragement (in Indian-English). In the end 8 minutes felt like a literal lifetime, and his hair is cut and he’s neat for school again.
As a sensory parent there are so many things I wish were optional IN South Africa, allowing boys to have long hair for school, allowing kids to wear civvies to school and to have service providers that are trained, just a little, to deal with a sensory customer.
We headed to the mini golf after the haircut at his request. We were all having a great time until the course got near the end and started getting tricky. The morning was wearing on and C was getting more and more overloaded. The mini golf is under a super tube, next to a fun fair and there is noise, a whistle and loud music constantly going.
On around hole 17, he was struggling to get the ball near the hole and he started to get angry and aggressive. When I suggested he take a break and let his brother have a turn he lost it. He rammed into my stomach at full run with the top of his head.
I physically grunted from the blow.
Had to step back, and just hugged him, even though all I wanted to do was to back off and scold him. In that moment I also noticed that all the people around us had now turned to see what was going on. The level of helplessness that you feel in these very rare, aggressive moments of SPD, are so soul shattering. It took me a good 30minutes to recover from the anxiety reaction from my own issues.
It was a good idea to play mini golf.
It was a good idea to get C’s hair cut.
It was perhaps not the best idea to melt the two into one outing after his reaction to the haircut.
But I suppose hind sight is 20/20 and SPD is like playing roulette, sometimes you win, sometimes you loose.
Xx
Kim.
